So many gay jokes tonight ...

So many gay jokes tonight about (James) Franco. Apparently if you're clean, well dressed and mildly cultured, you're super gay now. Is that why the rest of you guys are so aggressively fat and dirty? You think if you read one book and take a shower, dicks are going to just fly into your face.
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 Aziz Ansari

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I always have my setlist planned out, but the best moments are when the energy of the crowd just gets your mind working and you are able to come up with new tags for jokes and just riff off things in the room.
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 Aziz Ansari
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Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.
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I like the brand Band of Outsiders. Their suits are cut really slim, for smaller framed gentlemen.
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 Aziz Ansari