I yearn for the darkness. I ...

I yearn for the darkness. I pray for death. Real death. If I thought that in death I would meet the people I\'ve known in life I don\'t know what I\'d do. That would be the ultimate horror. The ultimate despair. If I had to meet my mother again and start all of that all over, only this time without the prospect of death to look forward to? Well. That would be the final nightmare. Kafka on wheels.
I yearn for the darkness. I pray for death. Real death. If I thought that in death I would meet the people I've known in life I don't know what I'd do. That would be the ultimate horror. The ultimate despair. If I had to meet my mother again and start all of that all over, only this time without the prospect of death to look forward to? Well. That would be the final nightmare. Kafka on wheels.
 Cormac McCarthy

Quotes from the same author

The wind sounded of Mother Earth's forsaken and abandoned cries.
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 Cormac McCarthy
See the hand that nursed the serpent. The fine hasped pipes of her fingerbones. The skin bewenned and speckled. The veins are milkblue and bulby. A thin gold ring set with diamonds. That raised the once child's heart of her to agonies of passion before I was. Here is the anguish of mortality. Hopes wrecked, love sundered. See the mother sorrowing. How everything that I was warned of's come to pass.
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 Cormac McCarthy
How does a man decide in what order to abandon his life?
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 Cormac McCarthy
It was always himself that the coward abandoned first. After this all other betrayals came easily.
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 Cormac McCarthy
Long before morning I knew that what I was seeking to discover was a thing I'd always known. That all courage was a form of constancy. That it is always himself that the coward abandoned first. After this all other betrayals come easily.
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 Cormac McCarthy