I hated the mountains and the ...

I hated the mountains and the hills, the rivers and the rain. I hated the sunsets of whatever colour, I hated its beauty and its magic and the secret I would never know. I hated its indifference and the cruelty which was part of its loveliness. Above all I hated her. For she belonged to the magic and the loveliness. She had left me thirsty and all my life would be thirst and longing for what I had lost before I found it.
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 Jean Rhys

Quotes from the same author

Of course she had some pathetic illusions about herself or she would not be able to go on living.
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 Jean Rhys
Some must cry so that others may be able to laugh the more heartily. Sacrifices are necessary.
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 Jean Rhys
I am the only real truth I know.
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 Jean Rhys
I'm no use to anybody,' I say. 'I'm a cérébrale, can't you see that?' Thinking how funny a book would be, called 'Just a Cérébrale or You Can't Stop Me From Dreaming'. Only, of course, to be accepted as authentic, to carry any conviction, it would have to be written by a man. What a pity, what a pity!
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 Jean Rhys
I long to be ... Like Other People! The extraordinary, ungetatable, oddly cruel Other People, with their way of wantonly hurting and then accusing you of being thin-skinned, sulky, vindictive or ridiculous.
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 Jean Rhys