As we go from Abraham Lincoln ...

As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don\'t believe in evolution.
As we go from Abraham Lincoln to Theodore Roosevelt to Mitt Romney, I now understand why the Republicans don't believe in evolution.
 Andy Borowitz

More phrases

It really is all about believing in yourself: 80 per cent mental, 20 per cent physical.
 Victoria Pendleton
I believe however that peace is attainable regardless of the Arabs mentality, society or government.
 Yitzhak Rabin
You have inside you the capacity to invest your mental, emotional, and spiritual gifts in a way that glorifies God, impacts the world, and satisfies your own soul. I believe that-and I want you to believe it, too.
 David Jeremiah
The 'Goonies' are a close knit group. They believe in themselves, even though there are doubters throwing darts at them outside...'Goonies never say die.' That's pretty in line with the mentality of our team.
 Robin Lopez
I believe that there's no improvement if you have an inferiority complex and victim mentality.
 Kim Nam-joon

Quotes from the same author

On July 4 we celebrate government of the people, by the people, and for the people, or as they are now called, corporations.
 Andy Borowitz
Facebook's new relationship status option: "No longer able to interact with actual people
 Andy Borowitz
The real news has gotten more surreal and absurd, and my fake news, if you want to call it that, has gotten more plausible. And at some point, those two trend lines crossed.
 Andy Borowitz
Christmas sweaters are only acceptable as a cry for help.
 Andy Borowitz
All Americans mourn the passing of the author of the Declaration of Independence, George Jefferson.
 Andy Borowitz